User blog:DerpyandDawn/Useronculous Race Ep 1
Don: Hai welcome to this Race and stuff anyway so like 16 teams are racing around the world! Let's meet them! Aqua and Mirnish, the Social Justice Heroes! *CONF *Aqua: Honestly whites suck. *Mirnish: Agreed. *Aqua: Same with HET's. *Mirnish: Agreed. *Aqua: We want to slay all of them and win, then donate to a project to blow up all whites. *Mirnish: Yes. And even tho we hate eachother, we will MAUL everyone else. *Aqua: Yeah same. *Mirnish: Shut up don't agree with me. *Aqua: Die you bitter fucker. *Don: Flurry and Berry. Online Friends. *Flurry: Berry,and,I,will,be,the,best. *Berry: Yeah we are gonna have so much fun! *Flurry: Shut,up,I,am,speaking! *Berry: Oh sorry. *Flurry: Anyway,pinkie,pie,and,noah,are,amazing.I,am,20,years,old,and,have,no,job,I,need,this. *Berry: 20?! I MET YOU ONLINE! I AM 14! *Flurry: i,meant,i,am,15,actually. *Don: Donnie and Blake, Fashion Critics *CONF *Donnie: So like we're totes fab and will like kill every1 else while looking awesome doing it. *Blake: Plus we're going to like, make sure we roast every privileged white. *Donnie: Like die honestly. *Blake: Shut it honestly. *Donnie: We're up and down... but whatever. Me and him have a blog called Now Trending W/ Blake & Donnie it's p hot. *Blake: Yeah. If we can save one team from wearing skorts, I am happy. Trust. *Donnie: Totes. *Blake: Like yeah. *Don: K. Fiz and Solar the Daters. *CONF *Fiz: Me and Solar love sex. *Solar: Yeah and drugs. *Fiz: And alchohol. *Solar: BUT we are broke so. We have to buy more. *Fiz: We should win, as long as our constant stopping at hotels doesn't make us lose. *Don: Cabbage and Izzy. The Best Friends. *CONF *Izzy: We are going to #blindside everyone. * Cabbage *nods* *Izzy: Cabbage doesn't talk much. But I am sure that we will win! I mean like, duh. * Cabbage *nods* *Izzy: Angie Jacuzzi my kween <3 * Cabbage sierra dawn thomas *Izzy: Yeah anyway we will slay tbh. *Don: Anyway, Sprit and X the Arch Enemies. *CONF *Spirit : IDK why I signed up witht his loser. *X: Shut up you democrat. *Spirit: WTF. You are republican like die. *X: Shut up you Anita Sharkeesian. *Spirit: OMG die. Anyways I am hot and will lead us to victory. *X: No me. *Spirit: Die. *X: Shut up you democrat. *Don: Timmy Turner and Darules. The Middle Schoolers. *CONF *Darules: I making eggy cheesy sanwcies. *Timmy Turner: I heard WANDA is competing! *Darules: staci is fat *Timmy Turner: We will make SURE we win! We will be awesome sauce! *Darules: what would vicky do if someone tried to touch or eat her food on plate *Timmy Turner: Uh... *Darules: what is tootie is in they odd cople or cass clown *Don: The Outcasts, Sean and JRO. *CONF *Sean: We are hated eh. *JRO: I hate hate. *Sean: But we are gonna destroy losers. *JRO: I hate losers. *Sean: I am sure we can win! *JRO: I hate winners. *Sean: ... *JRO: I hate winners that aren't us. *Sean: Yeah we will win eh! *Don: Maria and Finn, Foreigners. *CONF *Finn: I date several girls. *Maria: Strawberries pies. *Finn: I am not a skunk. *Maria: AHHHHH I HAVE FEAR!!!!!!!! *Don: VUF and Milk, The Smartasses. *CONF *VUF: We're better than those shady hoes. *Milk: Ye even tho we don't know em yet. *VUF: We are p mazing honestly. *Milk: Better than those loser shady hoes. *VUF: Yeah. *Milk: Anyway, we will beat everyone we are like geniuses or whatevs. *VUF: Yeah like duh. I will spit on their dead parents after having intercourse with them! *Milk: What. *VUF: Shh. *Don: Epic and CB, BBUK Superfans. *CONF *Epic: BBUK. *CB: Same. *Don: Twins, RJ and Wanda. *CONF *RJ: Me and Wanda like pissing people off. *Wanda: Yeah. I can grant wishes too. *RJ: She's a fairy. *Wanda: Yeah I am amazing honestly. *RJ: Me too. *Wanda: Not rly *turns RJ into KFC* *Don: KAI AND WELLY ATHLETES! *CONF *Kai: I will crush everyone. *Welly: Brawn > Brains. I am stoked dude like brah yes fuck omg bae yas duuuuude. *Kai: Yeah and every girl will fall for us. *Welly: We are hot. *Kai: Yeah. *Welly: Gnarly. *Don: Bulba and Ariel, Girly Girls. *CONF *Ariel: Hi. *Bulba: Yeah same. *Ariel: We are so nice. And girly too. *Bulba: Yeah same. *Ariel: I love boys. *Bulba: Yeah same. *Don: Tyler and Semaj. Nice Guys. *CONF *Tyler: We go to the same church. *Semaj: We are very religious. *Tyler: I love everyone and everything. *Semaj: I can't wait to make friends! *Tyler: Yes I love friends! I love rainbows too. *Semaj: Yeah. I love hapiness. *Tyler: Same! *Don: Chwiis and Heo, Sexists. *CONF *Chwiis: Yo bitch . Nigggaaaa I am a aussie bitchhh! *Heo: TBH We are winning, no girls on our team! *Chwiis: And we are white. *Heo: Well, I am not white. *Chwiis: Well at least we aren't gay or black. OR JEW! AHAHAHAHA! Heo: *Wow dude. So poetic. *Chwiis: IKR. *Don: Ryan and CD-TDA, Mean Admins. *CONF *Ryan: I am a bitch and I will fuck ing murder everyone who doesn't admit how fab we are! *CD: *nods* We are like, so chipotle. The others are like, poop. *Ryan: I hope all the privileged whites, sexists, homophobes, racists, and bigots DIE. Also. Everyone here should be gay. *CD: Yeah totes. *Ryan: Also I better not see any whites trying to trend set other cultures. THEY AREN'T YOURS!!!!! *CD: It's k Rye Rye, we will honestly slay all of them. Including racist whites. *Ryan: Yep. We will. #KingBeeBitch *Don: Our last pair, KidLego and FK . The Annoying Bitches. *CONF *FK: Jenn Brown is hot. This conf smells like mexicans. *KidLego: Trains. CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *--STARTING POINT-- *Don: Welcome teams!!!! *Everyone: Hai bitch. *Don: K so 2 lazy 2 explain. Use common sense. Good luck and DONT fuck it up! 3... 2... 1.... GO! *Donnie: *running* *Blake: *hits Don Box* We have to like, go to the CN tower. *JRO: *reads tip* I hate towers. *Sean: Let's go eh! *JRO: I hate CN. *Solar: OMG Baby look its a hotel. *Fiz: K Let's go fuck. *Aqua: OMG We have to go to a tower? Like grotty. *Mirnish: *nods* So gross. *Ryan: *yanks tip* K CD we are going to a tower... lets GO! *CD: *runs* *Heo: *to Girly Girls* How does it feel being first boot. *Ariel: OMG Not nice! *Bulba: Yeah same. *Izzy: *reads tip* Yay tower! *Milk: *grabs tip* K a tower VUF. *KidLego: *reading tip* WTF Why not a train station???? *--CN TOWER-- *Donnie: Look! It's a Don Box! *Blake: Ew. *slaps button and grabs tip* Don has terrible taste in Clothes. That green does NOT work. *Donnie: Same. We def need to update the blog and bash him. *Blake: Anyway, stairs or scares. *Donnie: How many stairs? *Blake: Who cares WE are doing scares. *Donnie: K Whatever. *Ryan: OMG Like back away I need to get a tip. *Blake: *gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasp* Is it Ryan.. Like... THE Ryan? *Ryan: Yeah. Like, don't wear it out. *runs to elevator* *CD: TBH Let's sabotage. *presses all buttons* *Ryan: Yes destroy the whites. Let's find another elevator! *Aqua : *runs to tip box and grabs tip* K, We are doing the scares I don't give a damn honestly. *Mirnish: Same lmao. *Aqua: Stop agreeing with me bitch. *Mirnish: Sorry that I agree with your one good opinion. *Aqua: Shut up. *Mirnish: No u. *pushes Aqua and runs to elevator* *Aqua: OMG WTF! Someone pressed all the buttons! *Mirnish: What a bitch! Ugh! Stairs then... *Maria : *grabs tip* Samey. *Finn: Like my moves. *Maria: XD Yes. *Milk: OMG Get away I need to get a tip! *VUF: *shoves Foreigners and grabs tip* Scares. *Milk: No. Let's do stairs. *VUF: Why. *Milk: Cause I am a smartass and I think it's a better plan. *VUF: Whatever. *Izzy: *grabs tip* Okay uh. Let's go on the elevator! *runs to elevator and sees that someone pressed all the buttons* Ugh! Someone broke it! *Cabbage: :/ *Izzy: Oh well... Uh... hmm. Let's #blindside someone! *Cabbage: Why? *Izzy: To win like, duh... Let's go plan a trap! *Cabbage: But doesn't it matter more if we are safe-- *Izzy: Ugh, silent. I know what I am doing Cab Cab! *Cabbage: Okay I guess... *Spirit: *running on stairs* OMG I am so sweaty. *X: Yeah you smell fucking stinky! *Spirit: Shut up you loser! *X: No YOU! *Spirit: You little fuck up. *X: Shut up bitch. *Spirit: You are so annoying! *CB: *in elevator* Yay Epic. We can win. *Epic: *watching Makoski* Hot. *CB: Yas. I love anime too! Do you like anime? *Epic: Ew no gross... *CB: Ugh you are SO lame. *Epic: Shut up! YOU LIKE KINGA! *CB: *gaaaaaasp* She is... A GODDESS! *Epic: Haha! *CB: Ugh we are NOT BFFs anymore! *Epic: Shut up! *CB: *ignores him* *Epic: STOP IGNORING MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *--ON SKYWALK-- *Blake: OMG! Ew these helmets are so gross! *Donnie: No kidding aubergine is so not my color! *Blake: Ugh! AHH! It's so windy! *Ryan: No kidding! This is totes lame. It's ruining my hair. *CD: C'mon Ryan. We need to run! *Ryan: Ugh fine...! *CD: *runs* *Ryan: *runs* *Ryan: Yay first place! *Bulba: *comes out of stairs* *Ariel: *follows and is panting* That was sooo long... But eee! Look there are some cute boys out there! *Bulba: Yeah. Same. *Ariel: Are you gonna say anything else? *Bulba: Yeah. Same. *Ryan: *about to get on the zipline* *Bulba: *grabs zipline* *Ariel: See ya Admins! *they zip down* *Don: Ariel, Bulba, First place! *Ariel & Bulba: *hug* EEEE! *Maria: *runs on skywalk and passes Blake and Donnie* *Ryan: Ugh they cut us off! *CD: Ryan who cares. Let's go! *goes on zipline* *Don: CD, Ryan, Second! *Ryan: *screams* *Maria & Finn: *zip down* *Donnie & Blake: *zip down* *Don: Foreigners 3rd! Critics 4th! *--LOBBY-- *Kai: Ugh! Finally we're done! *Welly: It's not my fault you took forever! *Kai: SHUT UP! *Welly: YOU! *Kai: UGH! HURRY! *goes down zipline with Welly* *Don: Athletes, 5th! *Welly: Ahw. Well that's not bad I guess... *VUF: *walks out of Stairs* Your idea was TERRIBLE! *Milk: Well, you never told me not to! *Chwiis: *runs out of elevator* Ugh! I am so annoyeeeeed! *Heo: *pants* That was hard work! *Milk: Um. You literally only went on the elevator! Loser! *Heo: Shut up you tranny. *Chwiis: YEAH YOU FAKE MAN! *Heo: REAL MEN TAKE ELEVATORS! *VUF: *rolls eyes and goes down zipline with Milk* *Heo: *follows* *Don: Smartasses 6th! Sexists 7th! *VUF: Yes! *Heo: 7th?! *Ariel: We got 1st! *Chwiis: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?! *Bulba: Yeah. Same. *--STAIRS-- *Sean: Ughhhhh! This is so bad eh! *Spirit: Stop whining loser. *X: Yeah loser! *Sean: *cries* *Spirit: *laughs* You DESERVE that! *JRO: I hate people who deserve that. *Aqua: Ugh you guys are so annoying. *Spirit: They are aren't they? *Aqua: Um yes. Wow... You actually AREN'T as terrible! *Spirit: Thanks! *Mirnish: *slaps Aqua* NO ALLIANCES! Especially not with a HET! *Spirit: I ain't hetero, I am bi! *X: Woah me too. *Sean: Same. *Mirnish: NO ONE CARES! *grabs Aqua and runs out of the stairs* Yes we're done! *--LOBBY-- *Mirnish: RUN RUN RUN! *Sean: *runs out* *JRO: *gets on Zipline with Sean* *Mirnish: *gets on Zipline with Aqua* *Timmy: Okay Darules let's go! *Darules: cheesy sanwich *runs to zipline* *Berry: *follows them with Flurry* *Don: OUTCASTS 8TH! SOCIAL JUSTICE HEROES 9TH! WE REACHED THE HALF WAY MARK! 10TH MIDDLE SCHOOLERS AND 11TH ONLINE FRIENDS! *--MAIN AREA-- *Izzy: Ugh! How are we still not done with our trap?! At least CB and Epic are still behind... *Cabbage: Yeah. We need to go. *Izzy: Let's trap them first! *Cabbage: Uh, how? *Izzy: Hmm... *points to room that says "ELECTRICITY"* Turn the electricity off! *Cabbage: *turns switch to off* *Izzy: Okay, now let's do the Stairs! *Tyler: *to some random person* Hi want to be friends! *Semaj: Tyler... we may have to go! :( *Tyler: Ahwww! *--FINISHLINE-- *Don: 12TH TWINS! 13TH ANNOYING BITCHES! *Twins: *hug* *KidLego: Choo choo. *--ELEVATORS-- *Tyler: Ugh... Epic... CB... I think we're stuck... *Epic: What? How! *CB: You like, ruined it or something! *Epic: Shut up! *--FINISHLINE-- *Don: 14TH ARCH ENEMIES! 15TH BEST FRIENDS! *Spirit: Thank god we didn't leave X! Jeez. Pick up the pace! *X: Shut up Hillary Cuntin! *Spirit: SHUT UP! *Izzy: Ahw. We almost left... *Cabbage: At least we're safe Izzy. *Donnie: Ugh! Why are those other three teams taking so long! *--HOTEL-- *Solar: *in bed with Lucina smoking* Damn that was fun. *Lucina: Owait... We still have that race thingy! *Solar: Oh yeah fuck. Let's take a bus to the boat thingy and we can just go! *Lucina: Awesome plan. *Solar: Yay. *--BUS-- *Solar: Yay us! *Lucina: I wish we could fuck again ;(. *Solar: Same... :( *--ELEVATOR-- *CB: Ugh! How will we get out? *Tyler: I don't know. :( *CB: Oh uh... Hmm. *Epic: I got a idea! *Semaj: Which is...? *Epic: You guys hoist us up, into the vent, then we do the same? *Semaj: Cool! *Tyler: *hoists them up to vent* *--VENT-- *Epic: Yay! *CB: You hurry, I will hoist them up... *Epic: K. *crawls through* *CB: *closes vent* Bye bye... >:) *--ELEVATOR-- *Tyler: So uh... Are they coming? *Semaj: Idk. Let's just wait tho! *Tyler: It's so dark... I am so scareeeeed... :( *Semaj: Me too. It's fine though! *--BOAT-- *Solar: K Lucina we are almost there. *Lucina: *grabs rock and throws it at the tower* *Solar: what the fuck *Lucina: I felt annoyed babe sorry. *Solar: Whatever. *--TOWER-- *Tyler: Ugh... The lights are off still! :( *Semaj: Uh... *the lights flicker on* *Tyler: Oh yay! *--LOBBY-- *Tyler: EEE We can win still! *CB: *bangs on vents* Hey! Hey! *Semaj: :O! *CB: Help us! *Epic: Yeah! *Tyler: ...But you didn't help us get out. :| *Epic: What?! You guys are the Nice people! *Semaj: Sorry but we gotta go! *Tyler: *grabs Semaj and they go down to the finish* *Semaj: Woah! Look! *Bird: *pecks at line* *Semaj: AHHH! *Tyler: Oh no! *falls into Lake Ontario with Semaj* *--LAKE ONTARIO-- *Solar: *sees the 2* Hi losers. *Lucina: Do u guys want help? *Semaj: OMG, Yes please! *Lucina: Lol too bad. *boat accelerates* *Semaj: :( *--LOBBY-- *Epic: *bangs on vent* *CB: Ugh! *tries to loosen screw* *Epic: Both at the same time! *Both: *stomp and the vent breaks* *CB: YES! *Epic: YAY! *CB: I am sorry for being so rude earlier. That argument was pretty petty... *Epic: Ahw thanks. You're forgiven. :) *CB: Aren't you gonna apologize? *Epic: Um, no, lmao. I did nothing wrong? Let's go. *CB: Pfft... *runs* *Epic: Wait... The line is broken! Ugh! *CB: Look down there! I see a speed boat! *Epic: JUMP! *CB: *jumps with Epic and they land in Lake Ontario* *Epic: Quick, grab it and let's go! *Both: *get on speedboat* *--FINISHLINE-- *Don: The three teams are here! But only 2 will survive to see another location! *Lucina: Look babe it's right there. *Solar: Slay! *Tyler: *swimming and panting* Ughhh... *Epic: *accelerates and passes Tyler* Yes! *CB: *rams into Lucina and Solar creating a hole* *Solar: HOLY SHIT WE ARE SINKING! *Lucina: Quick, let's hurry and swim there! *jumps and starts swimming* *Solar: But I don't want to get my hair wet! *Epic: *gets out of speed boat* We are there, c'mon, run CB! *CB: *runs* *Epic: *runs* *CB: *runs* *Epic: *runs* *Tyler: Ugh... We're done swimming... *Semaj: Okay, run! *Tyler: *points to golf cart* C'mon! *Both: *accelerate* *Epic: *gasp* THAT'S NOT FAIR! *Solar: *finishes swimming* Ugh. We are like there... My hair is wet... great! *Lucina: Run! *CB: *panting* I-I... Don't know if... I can *cough* make it... *Epic: :( *Tyler: *passes finish line with Semaj* Yes! *Don: Congrats Nice guys! 16th! *Semaj: Yay! *Solar: *runs* *Lucina: *runs* *Solar: *runs* *Lucina: *runs* *Solar: *runs* *Lucina: *runs* *Solar: Yes! Look the finish line! *Epic: Ugh! NO! *grabs Anime and throws him across the finish line and sprints* *Don: And the pair eliminated is... *Solar & Lucina: *sprint* *Epic: *sprint* *Solar: *passes finish line* Ugh! Yes! We are.. *sighs* safe... *Epic: FUCK! >:( *Don: Well, lucky for you Epic, today is a non-eliminating leg! *Everyone: WHAT?! *Don: *laughs* Well, what a shocking conclusion... right? See you next time on... Ridonculous Race! Category:Blog posts